I have been obsessing about this picture all day, especially in the toilet. In spite of all my efforts to ban them, the youngsters of the village have been holding celebrations wearing very tight T-shirts bearing the name of that drunken old bastard whose name I have been trying to erase from the shire I now rule with a rod of iron. There are so many things that are wrong with this picture. Firstly I can see her creamy legs. Secondly her skirt is far too short. Thirdly she is smiling. Fourthly it's obvious that her mother needs lessons in how to wash clothes - on very close and long inspection the skirt and t-shirt appear to have shrunk in the wash and her two lady things above are clearly on show. Surely this next picture, which is in fitting with my shire's state religion, is much better ?