Wednesday, 10 July 2013

Day 27 - Under the Volcano

Morning: The vicars have told me to keep my mouth shut again because they say they are fed up with me winding everyone up. What is the point of being Supreme Being if you can't do any spiteful winding and biblical smiting ? 

Anyway, here is my good old friend Fetullah Ghoulen who has perfected the art of being a real-life James Bond arch villain without anyone actually noticing. He has created a network of hundreds of faith colleges and schools in the United Shires, spreading our propaganda and new religion amongst the infidels and without using a penny of his $25 billion fortune. Unlike Ernst Blofeld he doesn't need to build missiles to threaten the world. He does it by brainwashing his pupils. And, and here is the hilarious part, our mutual enemy the President of the United Shires, Brad Orbarma, actually pays for it all! Brad Orbarma is truly our bitch.

Evening: Sod the vicars! I am ready for some smiting. Those bloody Brownies and Cub Scouts have invaded the park again and have also opened a street fete near the village square. I have sent my water cannon and riot police to the scene.

Just one foul move and we'll have you, you little trouble makers!

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